{"product_id":"keep-your-enemies-close","title":"Keep Your Enemies Close","description":"Oversized like your ego. Faded like your loyalty. Heavy like your silence when someone says, “we should talk.” This tee don’t just go on — it takes over.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nDetails:\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% heavyweight cotton — tough, like the truth\u003cbr\u003e\n• 7.1 oz — heavy enough to carry what they couldn’t\u003cbr\u003e\n• Garment-dyed \u0026amp; pre-shrunk — built to last, even when loyalty doesn’t\u003cbr\u003e\n• Boxy, oversized fit — enough room to outgrow people and problems\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dropped shoulders — says “I’m chill” but means “don’t try me.”\u003cbr\u003e\n• Wide neck ribbing — because you don’t duck drama — your neck won’t let you.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWear it to the function, wear it to court, wear it three days straight while you gaslight your situationship. It’s not just a tee — it’s a whole warning label with sleeves.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCHEST (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSLEEVE LENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27 ¾\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e39\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e9 \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29 ⅛\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e43\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e9 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e47\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e9 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31 ⅞\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e51\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e10 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e33 ¼\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e55\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e10 ⅝\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e34 \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e59\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e11 \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Oldest Existing","offers":[{"title":"S","offer_id":50496406585661,"sku":"8789527_17570","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M","offer_id":50496406618429,"sku":"8789527_17575","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L","offer_id":50496406651197,"sku":"8789527_17580","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL","offer_id":50496406683965,"sku":"8789527_17585","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL","offer_id":50496406716733,"sku":"8789527_17590","price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL","offer_id":50496406749501,"sku":"8789527_17595","price":46.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0707\/5256\/7613\/files\/mens-oversized-faded-t-shirt-faded-bone-front-69ee34b9cd84f.png?v=1777218951","url":"https:\/\/oldestexisting.com\/products\/keep-your-enemies-close","provider":"Oldest Existing","version":"1.0","type":"link"}